Please Don’t Park Your Camel Toe There! MUA Faux Pas!
My very first written thought! (Written thought as opposed to blog – I just don’t like the word blog).
I was at a shoot the other day when I was suddenly violated by my MUA (make-up artist)! Yes – violated by my female MUA! This had happened on a previous occasion with another MUA but I assumed it was a one-off accident – but I was wrong. As she carelessly manoeuvered around me with her foundation brush she suddenly paused, with my leg between her legs she decided to park her camel toe on top of my knee. She did not sit on my knee with her bottom, she simply parked her camel toe on my knee whilst leaning towards my face with her makeup brush. (I use the term camel toe as she was wearing very revealing bottoms which indeed did display her toe). She remained there for a few moments. It was uncomfortable. When I finally plucked up the courage to say something she moved away. Throughout the shoot she would reapply my make-up and again park her camel toe there – it was long enough for me to notice but not long enough that I had the guts to mention it – I think she may have had an itch there which she was trying to disguise as bodily contact caused by an occupational hazard. I tried to move around uncomfortably, cough, but she appeared unaware. Is there a polite way to ask a lady to not park their camel toe on you without causing extreme embarrassment to both parties? Probably not. I refuse to name the MUAs in question but please, please, if you are an MUA and you are doing my make-up, please, please do not park your camel toe on me…. it is just plain weird…. =(
Thank you to all the other MUAs who applied my makeup without parking your camel toe on me =)
How to Distinguish the Good MUAs from the Not-So Good Ones!
- Always carry mints – good MUAs are aware that they work in close proximity to their clients face and therefore bad breath is simply unacceptable.
- Always have clean hands and carry anti-bacterial hand gel – good MUAs do not want to ruin your make-up or cause acne breakouts (caused by the millions of bacteria which are all over hands).
- Always carry straws for their clients – we need to drink! Obviously straws minimise the need to re-apply lipstick.
- Park their camel toe on your knee or other body parts. It is unacceptable to park your camel toe on a client.
- Treat your head like a mannequin – wreckless grabbing of a person’s chin or the sudden jerking of a person’s head is not pleasant. How would you like it if I man handled your head like a football?!